Zoot Suit Riot

Excuse me, tailor, can you put four pockets on this picnic blanket?

The man in the middle is Deion Sanders, aka “Primetime”, aka “Neon Deion”.

After a stellar career as an NFL defensive back, while amazingly playing Major League Baseball as well, Deion has gone on to a long career as an NFL television analyst.

He’s 43 years old.

And he dresses like a complete jackass, still.

Like, Deion is just sitting there thinking, “I’m going on national television, where is my beige and yellow checkered zoot suit?  Yeah, the one with the four pockets on the right side (only two on the left).  Yeah, I think I’m going to do the yellow shirt underneath.”

Deion is dressed so absurdly that Michael Irvin, the man on the right side, looks like he’s dressed normally even though his suit is ridiculous by normal standards and he looks like he’s going to blast off.  Irvin used to set the standard for how ugly a suit can be for a television appearance.

Honestly, what is going through their heads?  It’s not “flashy”.  It’s not a fashion statement.

Fix it, Deion.  You look like a fucking jackass.

(But you were still the shit as a player.)

P.S.  I don’t know how I caught this picture with the heading, “What did we learn in week 1?”.  That was totally unintentional.  But hopefully Deion learned not to wear anything this ridiculous again.