What Will They “Think” of Next?

That's, like, soooo edgy.

Here it is.  The tank-thong.

With ideas this ingenious and a sexually harassing porn-stache CEO, it’s hard to believe the company is losing $10 million+ per quarter.  Shocking, I know.

First we had the disco pants and the pregnancy clothing.  Now the tank thong.

Note to clothing designers:  If your goal is to sell clothing, you should probably make items of clothing for which there is a purpose.

I know there’s a girl who’s going to comment that the purpose is so that your tank top can be tucked in without lines showing in your tights or what-the-fuck-ever.  Come on.  How often does that scenario arise?

Also, does this piece of clothing actually serve as underwear, or does it work in combination?  I’m very interested to know the answer to that question…and not in the perverted way that American Apparel’s CEO is.  I just feel like it might be a little weird if your underwear is actually part of your shirt.

Isn’t this just kind of a one piece swimsuit?

And really, it’s just a matter of time before some bearded fat guy, desperate for attention, will wear this thing out in public just to be shocking and show everyone how he’s a little bit off kilter, but with a good sense of humor about himself.

Then he’ll finish his PBR, ask the bartender for another (definitely not tip), steal some girl’s jacket, and have his photo taken by three party photographers, all with porn-staches, of course.

It ain’t easy bein’ “unique”.